All you have to do is think one happy thought...

This whole leaving thing is really starting to catch up with me. In a way I never could have expected. I mean, I guess that's the way it always goes, you can never really expect what's going to happen, it just happens. That's not that deep, but still.

The rundown, you ask? Well, it's quite simple really. This weekend, I drank, I partied, I dined out about 5 times, and I just generally had the most amazing weekend possible, the first one I've had on campus in awhile. Probably most amazing was that Jason showed up, with Josh, Shawn and John, three of his friends, and drank a little of the exorbitant amounts of alcohol that are still lingering in this here apartment. It was amazing, especially to discover that, well, Stanford is incredibly liberal on the amount of regulation of alcohol compared to other schools. The nice thing about that is that Stanford students are honestly more responsible, because there's no one staring over their shoulder telling them alcohol can do bad things to you. No - that's something we here learn for ourselves fast enough, thank you very much. Hehe.

Anyway, after the glories and crazy latenight shenanigans of Friday night, I had a wonderful Saturday, watching two enjoyable movies. First was Brick, which somewhat confused me but was amazingly hilarious because of how surrealistic it was. And naturally great because it featured the very dreamy Joseph Gordon Levitt, who I am about 90% sure is gay. Score one for the good guys! In any case, after that, Courtney and I watched Hook, and now I really really really want to be a father. I forgot how amazing that movie was, and how perfectly childish. Hehe. I'm such a little kid sometimes. I wish I could go to Neverland, eat imaginary food, fight imaginary pirates, live life like a little kid again. Whoops.

Alright, so yeah, today I spent mostly playing SimCity 4 and watching movies on TV, but Mao, Courtney and I also had the glorious experience of Stacks for brunch. That was, well, like tasting heaven. Or something that better fits the simile. Whatever. And the 4400 was just on! Season finale baby. I feel a little, unsatisfied. But it'll keep me content until next summer.

So yeah, it's been a good weekend. Now, Courtney is packing and getting ready to leave, and I am sitting here contemplating how I'm going to get by when I get to France, and what things are going to be like in 6 months, and where we're both going to be after that time. It's weird, it's like, these past 9 months we've been almost joined at the hip like some sort of siamese twin deal, and now we're splitting up. I really do feel a little like I'm leaving my twin, and like we're going to be separated but do that weird thing twins do sometimes when they can sense the other is in trouble or sad from 10 million miles away. I don't know. In any case, I'm excited to go to France, worried I'm going to lose myself in all the rush, and ready to face whatever comes my way. God, only 18 days...then I'll be on a jetplane. Don't know when I'll get back again. Ever feel like your life is a series of song lyrics? Well, maybe it is. I guess that's not half bad.

Now it's time to go to bed, and lie awake thinking about what I would do if given the chance to have a 4400 ability, wondering if I'd ever take that risk. For the record, probably not.

That's it! I've had it with these motherf***ing clones of these motherf***ing Vincents!

So, I don't know, in all the rush that has led me to today, I forgot to blog about the previous weekend. As in, August 18-20, also known as...the glory days. So, whoops...here it is! Just pretend I'm writing as if it's Monday, and not Wednesday.

I went home this weekend. As usual, it was quite the roller coaster ride from start to finish. Now, we all know how much I love roller coasters (if we don't, then, well, how do we even call ourselves my friend? hehe, unless you've been unfortunate enough to have met me in my transitional period, a.k.a. the last year or so, in which case, it's excusable). But, well, I don't much like the metaphorical kind of roller coaster - in general.

It all started out with the stresses of (or should I say as a result of) the Stanford Financial Aid Office. Every year it seems my mother and I must bicker over the tiniest of details in the financial aid award, which is why I dread the coming of that plain white envelope at the end of every summer. As usual, my mom had some questions, I had some feelings of being treated like a child, and we worked through it. But it put a bit of a damper on my weekend, making me feel a bit more standoffish with my mother than I really should have been. What can I say? Post-teenage angst? I don't know, whatever. I am growing up, it is alleged.

So, with that in mind, I wasn't able to be as helpful as I would have liked to have been in the whole party surrounding the premiere of the glorious film Vincent Lin Must Die. If you haven't heard of it, I pity you, but some day, when Nick is a famous multi-millionaire director, many will look back into his past and find this gem of a film. (No pressure, Mr. Ochoa). So yeah, because I got to mostly sit back and enjoy the party, I feel I had a better time than I should have. But in any case, I did my best to help out, and the party went off quite charmingly, thanks to the Viano family as well as the planning efforts of Nick, Leslie, Jon and Matt. And myself, I'd like to think. And, well, the movie was just, well, unspeakably hilarious, funny beyond my wildest dreams, and - to think - the product of my friends. Really, it was amazing. If you get a chance, you should look up the preview on YouTube!, and maybe buy the DVD (when Nick gets around to it), since it'll be all the rage in only a few years.

So yeah, that was my weekend. I guess I'm going to take to writing about my weekends mostly, because, well, I think it's pretty clear what my week days are filled with. Work, some down time, and sleeping. Oh, and seeing Courtney as much as I friggin' can because, well, she's leaving this weekend!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think I'm about to die. Six months in France might not be such a good idea any more. I don't know. I've committed to it, though, and, well, you may not know this about me, but once I've committed to something, it's about 99% guaranteed that I'll follow it to the end. Man, though, France will be an experience. I get all jittery just thinking about it. So, at the risk of sounding trite and boring...here goes nothing!

Only a week and a half of work left. The summer goes by way too quickly.

Musings on Santa Rosa, and friends...

This weekend was amazing! Based on a decision made about a week ago, I drove up to Santa Rosa, to visit my bestest friend of eternity, Melissa. Some of you readers (I kid myself to think that there are more than, like, 3 people who read this) may have heard of her, and of our friendship that has endured 16 years, a moving away, another moving, college, different schools, and the virtually insurmountable obstacle to childhood friendships that is adolescence. As you can tell, we are quite good friends, and, well, what's great about it is that distances don't really matter, because you just get us together and it's like old times again.

In any case, rediscovering my past like that has lead me to the revelation that all of my friends are such amazing people! I mean, I don't mean to brag, but, let's be honest, my friends are better than yours. (Damn right, they're better than yours. I could teach you, but I'd have to charge.) I mean, take for example the fact that I'm going through all sorts of changes to do with this whole maturing thing, including coming out and a variety of other things. Have I lost a single friend in all the changes? Well, the correct answer, dear reader, would be, no! I have not. And frankly, to have a group of friends that is that amazing is just, well, it's overwhelming. Sometimes it's just whelming, but most of the time, it's overwhelming.

In any case, Santa Rosa is an amazing place. If you've never been, you should definitely check it out. It's like the place where all the hippies went to raise their kids, and for that reason it is, essentially, spectacular! Really laid-back and easy going, like what San Francisco wanted to be before it got all big-city and business-y. So yeah, I had another spectacular weekend. Each one seems to be striving to outdo and outperform the last. I mean, I have trouble believing that I could possibly have a better weekend than this one. But then again, next weekend is THE BIG PARTY!!!! AHHHHH!!!!!!!!! WOOOOO!!!!! Alright, yes, well, this is where I leave to go to bed. Goodnight, you beautiful people.

Bohemia unleashed...or the travails of a day to myself.

I don't know if you've ever had one of these days, but if you haven't, you should certainly try it out. Sometimes it's just a great idea to have some time to yourself, to just do some self-pampering and screw the finances to hell. Lately, I've been realizing that my busy work schedule has been getting me more stressed, and thus, I determined, it was time for a day all to myself. Likewise, what a day it has been!


So, the rundown. What did I do today? I'm sure that's the question that's on your head. It's certainly on mine. In due time, my dear reader, in due time. Ok, it's due time. I started the day getting up around 10, at which time I made pancakes and watched the thoroughly entertaining if not exceedingly mind-numbing film Anaconda! Yes, that's right, the amazingly horrific (in a hilarious way) and amazingly intelligent (with undertones of idiodicy) film - nay, masterpiece! - starring the blindingly talented Jennifer Lopez (some of you may know her as J-Lo) and the dashing and talented Ice Cube. Oh, it was glorious!

In any case, if it is possible to top such a feature, I then further numbed my half-asleep brain watching the engaging film 10 Things I Hate About You, which, despite Heath Ledger's (cough) dashing (cough cough) good looks (cough - can you tell I'm being ironic? - cough), was mostly entertaining for its eye-candy (of the Joseph Gordon-Levitt variety - what, nerdy types are hot!).

Now, I'm sure you're all very engaged by my day thus far, as I was as well. In any case, at 2 PM, I decided I had already put in too much effort. So, naturally, I took a nap! It was spectacular, as I slept for an hour. Then I decided it was time to be productive, go do something, get some personal fulfillment. Well, in any case, once that was done, I went into Palo Alto!

I did some reading at the illustrious Coupa Cafe (for those of you around campus, if you've never studied there, I highly recommend it. They have free wireless!). While there, I had a cafe milano, which outed me $4.25 but was worth every cent. Presently, you may be saying - but Reo (or whatever you call me), what did you do after that? Well, good question! After two hours reading at the cafe, I decided it was time for some dinner. So, I went to another cafe - the Cafe 220 - for some Mediterranean food. It was good, you know, Cafe 220 style. Then, I decided...drumroll please...to see LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE!

Yeah, it was the perfect way to cap off such a relaxing and me-centered day. I saw the movie while being surrounded by about 149 old and pretentious types from Palo Alto - you know, the money-donating liberal types that populate the hills and tree-lined streets around this campus - who could not stop chattering about how Robin Williams was so great in that movie - oh, what was it called - The Night something or another...ah, yes, Listener - thank you Marge! God...I just wished one of them had stopped talking about the latest expansion of the Stanford Business School or Toni Collette's breakdown scene or the differences in the novel and the movie or the amazing reviews Little Miss Sunshine was getting despite it's "horrible" trailer. Ugh. In any case, I showed them! I promptly bought a ticket and caught them all off guard as I sat in a seat in the corner. Right. Yeah. Nobody noticed, but oh well. I had a good time, a few laughs, and clearly made the woman sitting next to me uneasy by virtue of my being there. Sometimes I really just feel like the young bohemian I'm sure to become in Europe.

In any case, that was my glorious day. Did some thinking, did some reading, did some soul searching, and felt independent. Sometimes it's great to just have a day to yourself - to do things you want to do, and to know that you are perfectly capable of eating alone in a restaurant or sitting alone in a movie theatre. I think I'm ready to face another work week, finally.

Random Sense of Foreboding

I don't think Paris will be all I hope for it to be. It will be different, not spectacular, not unspectacular. Amazing just the same. I'll be there for six whole months! I mean, once the splendor and awe of first arrival wears off, what will it be like? I suppose no one will know until I'm there. Let's just give it a gander.

"I think I'll go to Boston." Or Paris.

Best Day in a Damn Long Time

So, Courtney and I had a record-length day date yesterday. It was based around the premise of our seeing Rent on stage (as in the musical, made obscenely famous by the release of the film version and it's astonishing popularity on Broadway). That was amazing, infinitely better than the movie, simply because so much more was explained, and it was much more interesting to see how things played out on stage as opposed to in film, where backgrounds actually are Santa Fe or New York City, instead of a stage resembling an abandoned and graffitied warehouse with people dancing in amazingly choreographed numbers. I don't know, somehow when everythings not spelled out for you in hyperreal, two-dimensional picture form and you have to use your imagination it's just infinitely more engaging. Go figure!

That said, following the musical and our mutual 4th weekends in a row in the city (yeah, we decided we've really become more San Franciscan than Stanfordian on weekends), we came home and ate at Janta (a.k.a. best restuarant in Palo Alto) and watched Imagine Me & You, Courtney's current favorite movie (in case you haven't heard). That was enjoyable, and got the Turtles stuck in our heads for awhile (as if we didn't already have the songs from Rent running through our heads). It also got me thinking about the characters I tend to identify with in movies, which is naturally a reflection of my character. But then, a movie about discovering lesbianism is always going to be entertaining. Especially if one of the girls has a hot and exceedingly sensative husband.

Following this film, we went to see...you guessed it! Another movie! Hehe, it was amazing! It was Scoop! It was Woody Allen! So yeah, if you haven't thought about seeing it, first off - where have you been? - and second - it should be your highest priority next movie to see! It's a hilarious movie, with Scarlett Johanssen and Hugh Jackman (who, without the Wolverine hair, actually has a surprisingly small head). Ms. Johanssen is amazing, as always, as an awkward American journalism student. I mean, need I say more? It's Scarlett Johanssen for "Bob's" sake!

So, what can I say to summarize this amazing day, except that it was amazing in every way! I haven't had a day so fun in awhile, which is proof yet again that Courtney is leading a double life as Courtney Hill by day and Batman (woman) by night. Now it's time for me to spend a day vegging, in order to recover from, well, you know...

Time

It's 83 degrees at 9:53 PM.

That's just crazy. So crazy I can't even think to write anything.

I think I'll just go lie in my bed, and never fall asleep.


PART II:

It's now 11:11 PM the next day, and we've just broken the sixties people! 69 degrees! Let's have a party!

Make a wish before it's 11:12.

Life as a Tourist

So Nick and Jon came up this weekend. It was good times, we went to the city for a night, hung out with a friend of Nick's, did some toursity things. We saw North Beach, and I was really excited to go to City Lights! We also walked our asses off, Jon and Nick more than me, but still. It's kind of strange, I mean, being a tourist but not really being one. It's like hypocritical. I felt like I was a tourist in the city, but at the same time I feel like a local resident. I wonder if that ever goes away. Maybe if I actually lived in the city it would be different. We'll see if that ever happens.

Right. Well, I don't have much to say. All I can really say is that it's really good to know you have some good friends, friends who just seem like the type you could never get tired of, the type that you can have a good time with no matter where you are. I dunno, I mean, it's like, the three of us - in fact, the majority of my Orange County friends - grew up together and, well, now we just know so much about each other and are so much a staple in each others' lives that we have no where to grow but closer. Now I'm being all sappy and weird, so I'm gonna stop. But, well, Nick I know you can see this, and Jon, if you read it, I'm glad to have spent this weekend with you guys. It was a great time. Makes me realize how much I miss Orange County - or, well, the people there.

Alright, well, here's looking forward to being a tourist over again and going to Paris! In all truth, though, you have to get the toursity things out of the way before you can really come to know a city. It's all about the discovery; and alot of the time that's the best part. So, while I utterly detest the sight of toursity-types fumbling with their maps and questioning the MUNI driver as to how to pay the fare and what the transfer does and whether they should go to Pier 39 or to Ghirardelli Square or to Alcatraz, well, I realize I did that at one point not to long ago myself. Only after you've done all those things can you discover the real special parts of a city, and, this weekend, I guess the lesson for me is to let the tourists do their thing, since, well, they just want to learn. Something we all do.

Je suis en train d'ecriver sur mon blog...

This is, I think, the first time I've written on a weekend. I don't know. It's Saturday right now, and I'm currently in the process of writing this entry, while simultaneously watching Mao play Tetris thingamagig on the SNES and waiting for John to finish dinner (emphasis added). In case you are wondering, the title of this post means, "I am in the middle of writing on my blog." Yep.

So, the rundown: let's see, since last time, I have gone to work three days. Lately (well, since I started working) I've been going in mostly in the mornings, then getting to leave in the afternoon since there's not much for me to do. There are two possible explanations for this: one, I'm just lazy and don't want to take on other things, or two, I work much more efficiently than either of my employers had expected. I think it's really some combination of the two, about equally split both ways.

In any case, yesterday (a.k.a. Friday) I got out of work around noon. I had to give a presentation to one of the senior groups in Millbrae in the morning, which went well...the group seemed to enjoy it and they gave me free eclairs! They were so good. The pastries in France will really be the death of me when I get there. But let's deal with that later. Alright, so after work, came home, sat around for a few hours, then Mirrielees went to see Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest. I just had to type the whole title, for the effect of it. In any case, it was an interesting movie; entertaining, in any case. Good? Well, I can't really say. So much of it was just hilariously absurd that I ended up having a good time. Which, when you come down to it, is the point of seeing a movie, is it not? Too often I feel people go to the movies looking to learn something new or to gain some new insight through the movie, but when it comes down to it, movies are about entertainment. They're about escapism and whatever emotion you want to feel when you see a movie. Last night for me that emotion or experience or whatever was just to have a good time, and Pirates did that for me. So, yes, I enjoyed it. (Though, on a side note, I do love it when a movie has some deep and insightful message, even if I don't agree with that message or idea. Sometimes I feel like insight, sometimes I lean more towards escapism. Blah.)

So, dear friends, we now find ourselves on today. Today, I got up at like 10:30, then had to take my car in to Pep Boys because, well, I discovered, driving to AMC Mercado last night, that I only had one functional headlight! Fortunately, I wasn't pulled over. But, I did have to go through the ordeal of driving to San Jose to find the nearest Pep Boys and waiting "2" (it turned out to only take about 1, but John, Adrian & I had walked to Santana Row, so we didn't want to go back right away) hours for my car. In any case, got some new threads from Urban Outfitters (I feel they are fitting of the description threads) and am now, post-nap, sitting, typing this blog. Yep. It's been an exciting week, as you can tell. Just another episode in the extremely normal life of Reo. Alors, j'ai fini!

So Orange County...

So I went home for the weekend. It was, essentially, amazing. You never realize how much you miss a place, how much that place defines you, how much you want to go back to it and feel safe and at home every day. I already miss Orange County, which is really hard to explain, especially since Orange County (some of you may know it as the OC, an objectionable name) is basically the center of all things horrible. I felt so out of place, being the NorCal-ian that I have become over this past year. But still, it's home. It's the place where I can drive around freeways and feel like I can actually drive, the place where I can go to the beach because it's only 15 minutes away, and, most importantly, the place where the friends I grew up with are, the friends who mean so much to me I would go home just to see them, even if I never saw the rest of the county.

In any case, on Sunday the amigos and I had a bonfire at Huntington Beach, which, as always, was good times. Bonfires are like the culmination of everything in me that is Orange County. This one was special, though, because, well, all of us have just grown up so much. It was fun to chill and smoke a cigar in the twilight and lit by the reddish-glow of a burning blaze, to be offered a hookah by some nearby fire-admirers, and to go down to the ocean late at night to see the glow of the moon or to, well, be one with the ocean...if that makes any sense. I stayed up sunday night until like 4AM, as I had Saturday night, just for the heck of it, just 'cause Vincent and Jason and I are basically inseperable when you get us together.

So yeah, I had a great time. Got to relieve a little bit of the longing that I was having to get back home. You know, it's strange how many times home can redefine itself in your lifetime. Maybe not redefine, so much as add more locations that you can call home. For me, home is Orange County, home is Stanford, home is the L.A. Basin, home is the Bay Area - and, in a few months, I'm hoping home will also be Paris. I carry a little piece of each everywhere I go, and that's why each one is home. That's why I am so Orange County, whether or not I want to be.

(This post is dedicated to Hannah, who is rediscovering her home in Latin America, and who insists that I update. Hehe.)

His name is Reo and he dances in the sand...

So, today has been an interesting day, to say the least. Courtney and I went to SF Pride, which was fun...lot's of gay people in one place. It's nice to see what the community really is, you know, instead of the Stanford Bubble's exceedingly exclusive community. I had an interesting realization, though, when I was there. It was like a real, actual, realization that I am part of this community, you know, that I don't have to act it or dress it or talk it or look it, but, deep down, I am it. Just like everyone else there. Ok, well, it's idealistic and naive, maybe, of me to say that...but it's true. I've never really felt like I fit into the community, mostly because I'm so so so so so so so focused on being an individual and never being a stereotype. But in the end, stereotypes are really just a first step to finding your individuality and identity...right?

So yeah, that was fun. Enlightening, if you will. I'm glad, I think, to say that I belong to a sexual minority, because it just makes life so much...I don't know, something. You get a better perspective on everything, a more open mind, and so on.

In any case, just got done watching Latter Days, the movie about the gay mormon missionary. If you haven't seen it, you really should check it out. It's a great sappy gay love story...and equally as corny as the description I just provided sound. SO GOOD! I wish I could meet a gay mormon. Yeah, not gonna happen. But I like the whole everything-is-interconnected/ God-is-sending-you-messages-in-everything/ fate-is-leading-you-to-your-destiny message the movie had. I know it's cheesy, but sometimes, I really just want to buy into that bull. Just believe that everything I do, every thing I believe, everything I see, every choice I make is leading me to one place...which is the love of my life. I'm such a hopeless romantic sometimes.

Alright, so, concluding remarks: pride is fun if your gay/lesbian/trans/queer, more fun if you are already part of the community (or have a boyfriend/date/whatever); the enlightenment is coming, just wait; and the LDS community is a huge, untapped pool of gay men. Oh, and, my name is Reo and I'm dancing in the sand, just like that river twisting through a dusty land...

The Unbearable Hotness of Being (my apologies to Kundera)

It is soooo incessantly hot. It's been, like, the first two days of summer, and, well, summer's here with a bang. I can't stand the heat, it just makes me want to go home and lie around in my underwear, but, of course, that's not always easy, especially when you're working the 9-5.

In any case, if anyone knows where the AC is, or how to replace scorching heat with sleet, snow, and rain, let me know. Whoever came up with the concept of summer, well, let's just say they didn't have their thinking cap on when they made it.

Sun, sun go away
Come again some other day...or never.

The Working Man

So, I started work today. It was a great time. I have a commute! And an apartment! And a credit card! And I'm buying my own laptop, with my own money! And...well, that's about it. But, you know, working man style.

I've moved into the apartment in Mirrielees, with my three roommates (one of which is not here) - Adrian, John, and Eric, and our temporary guest - Abel. It's good times, we had home-cooked burgers for dinner tonight. Which might sound bad, but consider our dinner last night of...you guessed it! PIZZA! We are real college students now.

Anyway, then this morning, at the UNGODLY hour of 7:00AM I got up, to get ready for my morning commute. I was out the door around 8, and, thanks to their being no traffic (and the really annoying and boring shows that plague so many radio stations) I was there in about 35 minutes. Which is surprising, considering I felt lost for about half of the trip. But, turns out I know my way around.

Then, after working for a few hours in the morning, I went to downtown (in my proper working-man attire: an olive green dress shirt and pleated khakis) to have lunch at Round Table...yes, more pizza. But actually, I got a sandwhich. Still.

In any case, on the way home, I stopped by the supermarket, got a few things for the family (and myself) and came home. Then, a bunch of us (me, Adrian, Eric, Courtney) went and got a ton of food (well, not a ton, but still) and came back and got dinner. Then I went down the street (I'm really psyched to be able to drive around this campus) to visit Courtney (who had left one of her grocery bags behind from the earlier trip) and to watch the end of The Wedding Date with Mao! It was good times. Really, driving is the way to go on this campus. I would avoid driving only if we had an underground subway system really, which would then be just as fast. but, well, that's not gonna happen any time soon.

So, now, here I am. Staring out my window at people carrying grocery bags to their room. Damn it feels good to be a yuppy!

Welcome

This is the true story of one stranger
Picked to live abroad and have his life blogged
Find out what happens, when people stop being normal
And start being...REO!

The Reo World, Stanford 2 Paris

(Thanks to Nick for the inspiration to this entry.)